Any and Everything

December 28, 2023

I am so ready for this year to be over. I don’t know if it is because the terrible year I have had or if it is just that I’m walled off… but I’m tired of letting anyone make me feel disappointed or sad anymore. I feel like I know what is best for me and that is not good for me.

It isn’t anyone else. It is literally just me figuring out what I need to do for myself. What boundaries that I need to set in order to be happy. This time around I’m going to live for me. I don’t want to be in a spot where I’m so enamored with someone that I lose myself… Never again.

I’m starting to really like this person that I am slowly evolving into. I’m starting to feel a level of comfort in myself. I’m finally feeling more like I did before Robert died. I know that is weird and I don’t mean that I am feeling like a teenager. It isn’t that.

I am just allowed to be me, unapologetically, for the first time in many years. It is a good feeling in these waves of many emotions. It almost confuses me because I remember when I was comfortable in my own skin back then. Now I am just older. I greatly appreciate this. I want more of it.

I guess it is time for me to hit the sack. I hope you all have a wonderful night.