Any and Everything

March 2, 2024

I always said I was going to be honest… I got into my feelings last night. I cried. I’m not there anymore. I gave G more chances than I should have. One of my friends made a good point at this age I need to have requirements not requests. And that is what I am gonna do for now on. He ghosted me again. I mean he got back to me but it took me sending a stern message. I don’t want to be an option in anything that I do. I want to be the first choice. I am sure he will think that I am doing this because he couldn’t come down this weekend. That isn’t it… It is the fact that he doesn’t communicate with me effectively. That is one of my requirements. If I had not liked him so much then he would not have gotten so many chances. I need to turn that part of myself off. You mess up you get booted because I deserve better than that. I have been through too much to just allow anyone to treat me anyway they want.

I don’t want to be tied down yet but I would like to know that the one I am connecting with to show me some sort of affections. Let me know they think of me. The amazing thing a “good morning” or “good night” text can do… That reassurance is what I really need. I went so long being treated so bad. I am not going to make that mistake again.

For me like and love are not even close. So, while I am a bit hurt I will get over this quick. I am sorry to keep rambling about these things. I am marching forward away from all this stupid stuff. I think I almost felt again… That scares me because that is the last thing I need right now. I have so much going on in my life I don’t want or need that right now. This is for the best.

N, I think effectively wants to start dating… I don’t think that is plausible at this point. He hasn’t said anything about it but we talk so much more here lately. That is a good feeling.

It is time I nix everything that makes me feel bad. I didn’t feel like myself when I woke up today. I took my sleep meds last night. My sleep schedule has been off again and I need to regulate it. But it makes me groggy the next morning. That is why I don’t take them every night. Only when I need to get regulated again. Once I do, I don’t need to take them again until I need to. Sometimes it is months and sometimes it is weeks. I just don’t like taking them but they work

Greg has invited some friends and I to join his radio show tomorrow and I can’t even express how excited I am. I like talking to greg and it is so much doing the show.

I am ok. I just wanted to vent a bit. I really don’t do that enough with the things in my life.

Well I suppose it is time for me to be productive and do something today. I hope you all have an amazing weekend heart

Staking out your territory loud and clear works for the mongoose and it can work for you. Boundaries Baby!

-You Do You