Any and Everything

January 11, 2024

Today I feel like I haven’t had too much time for myself. It’s been a busy one. I had to take one of the twins to the doctor. She is fine, but her twin stepped on her back trying to pop it… Better safe than sorry. Then we had to go get an x-ray done at the outpatient service in the local hospital. Of course, we had to pick up her anti-inflammatory medication. I chose to go through the drive-through… Now, that sounds like just a bit of stuff, but believe me when I tell you, it took every bit of all day.

Weather day tomorrow. I would sleep in but I have a quick errand to run in the morning. I still get to wake up to no alarm. That is good enough for me.

I’ve had this thought. I wonder why people behave badly for no reason. I can’t stand people like that, and there seem to be so many of them. The kids seem to be doing ok today. They haven’t had a bad day in a while, and I am thankful for that. I got everything I needed to get done, even my schoolwork. I am officially done for the week.

Doing things alone still feels odd. I know I am an adult, and I made all the decisions before, but it feels different than it once did. I feel the absence. I know Josh and I had a complex and unhealthy relationship. But I miss him. You can’t be with someone as long as we are together and not miss their presence. It just isn’t possible, in my opinion. Even if it isn’t exactly them that you miss. It could be just that normalcy that you always knew. Now I don’t miss the bad times. Not a bit. Actually I am grateful that they are over. I still can’t believe I stayed as long as I did. Looking back I was conditioned over time. Not that I thought what was happening was normal but I downplayed it to myself. Never again.

I hope you all have a good night. Tomorrow is a new day! and the beginning of the weekend. Please enjoy yourselves.